Remember my last angsty post about The Shameful Truth About How Twilight Changed My Life? Well as promised here is the followup to that where I finally admit to myself that I like looking at Rob Pattinson.
At the beginning of this twilight love I swore I loved the saga because I loved Bella & Edward. For all the reasons I had mentioned in my last post was why I clung onto this series and kept reading it over and over until I wasn't sure how many times I had read it but just wondered where in the reading cycle I was.
So now things are good. I feel worthy and Mr. TC and I are back to loving like bunnies again. So why am I still here in the blogosphere with all of you? Well, after a while of being immersed in this twilight world I slowly evolved to think of Rob Pattinson as Edward. The mental porn that is lemony fanfic did not help these matters out at all.
|Mafia Prince Edward from Emancipation Proclamation|
Somehow I am in denial that I like Rob Pattinson just because he is hot. It just seems so shallow for me to admit it and I'm not sure why. Even me writing the above phrase leaves me feeling juvenile and guilty as if I was a whistling construction worker ogling a woman on the street.
I feel like these men have no appreciation for a possible brilliant mind or that woman's feelings but is just treating her as a sex object. Of course I like Rob's adorkableness and self-deprecating awkward artsy character but I think I'd still like looking at him if he was a smooth cocky bastard.
All my original twilight merchandise always had Bella & Edward, never just Edward. I kept telling myself that I loved the love story part and not just him. Then things have now slowly evolved to the point where I can finally admit that I love Robward and, yes, Rob Pattinson can often make me drool and that's okay.
|I'm finally okay to go from buying this blanket|
|to buying this one|
I am in no way judging anyone for their love of Rob or any other actor and have never judged anyone in the past. It has just been my own internal struggle with the idea. With my immersion into the twilight blogging world I'm finally allowing myself to openly feel it and enjoy it.
So keep up all the Rob pics, videos, and manips. I am happy to hold my head up high and put up just a picture of Rob in my banner instead of insisting it be Robsten. I watch videos of Rob on youtube without hiding in the bathroom. I'll even drool over pictures of Rob when he is someone other than Edward.
Now, onto getting my hands on that new blanket...